fuuccckk

its been 6 months since i last blogged, what is that about?! apologies to the loyal armies who rioted throughout the country, i heard ur pleas and have returned.

so whats new with you?! i finished uni, barely scraped a 2:2, which considering the ultimate bender i've been on since feb is pretty good going. met some interesting guys, dated liikkee 3? i dunno, a few anyways, it all gets a bit contorted with the amount i drink, went to possibly the best house parties, basement raves and hot-tub outings the world has ever seen, got a nose bleed in pizza hut, gave away the plotting guinea pigs and packed up my entire life in 2 days. mad few months.

am now back in the glorious midlands attempting to score some variety of full time work that allows me to continue this champagne existence, so i settled on PR, ab fab style. its gonna be a poor year, as have two interviews lined up for internships with only minimal expenses paid, but i can survive on vapour and fumes, it'll be fine. sights are set on NYC, its just gonna take a lil bit of ladder climbing to get there first.

my days are mostly filled now with watching the rachel zoe project, go watch it, its incred, and shopping. sounds fun right? i'm bored out of my tiny mind. also have a new trainer bird, i've only been once and my ass is literally rock so fingers crossed i'll look like a kardashian by next week (not khloe tho...i love you girl but u did not get the looks).

good few months for music! tyler, odd future, the return of nas, new laura marling, oh land, foster the people, washed out, the rapture, bon iver, jay and kanye......wowzers. excited for the next few months. LANA DEL RAY is  my current fave, listen to 'video games', serious nostalgia.

my alcoholism is getting better, i try not to drink before 12 anymore, and stop when i go crossed eyed. small steps! i'm still a bit blue over leaving chester, my friends and my beautiful room, plus some other people i met along the way but i'm not crying anymore, and i'm somehow managing to control my desire to murder my dad when he breathes like darth vader and looks at me with insulting awe when i get an answer correct on university challenge. EVERYONE KNOWS THE PERIODIC SIGN FOR NITROGEN YOU IDIOT. cleansing breaths are the answer. its a catch 22 with how soon i go back, because i feel like i can't get over the place if i keep visiting, can't get over everything that happened there, but i miss the clear air and the way the city looks from the walls around 6pm, and not being able to walk 10 feet without seeing people you know, or wish you didn't know.  i think i have to just sit tight and wait for it to pass.

the new gardener is a bit fine, sleeve and neck tattoos. i'm a sucker for controversy x